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The Daily Read: You’re a Traveling Jerk

Because having three square feet of space can make anyone crazy.


We all know the things that people do on airplanes that drive everyone crazy: reclining all the way back, talking your ear off when you want to take a nap or read, eating smelly food, etc. But did you know that there are a lot of other things you could be doing that are driving your fellow passengers mad.
You lean on seats while waiting for the bathroom.
Did you know that the main purpose of a seat is for someone to sit in it? Fun fact, right? So why the hell have you taken it upon yourself to rest your grubby little elbow on my headrest, or worse, plant your ass haphazardly on the top of my seat. GTFOH. A simple hand on the seat for balance would do.
You’re constantly leaning over to look out the window.
I’m literally writing this as someone leans over me to look out the window. If there is nothing to note outside the window besides clouds, why are you leaning so close to me? Please take your face and move it a foot away from where it is currently placed. Thanks!
Being lovey-dovey with your PDA.
Yes, you’re in love and it’s adorable. But for Yeezus sakes, do you need to turn the entire row of seats into your loveseat?! Leaning your head on your boyfriend to take a nap is one thing, but having your had on his crotch as you rub under his shirt is making me want to vomit. And yes, I have actually witnessed this.
Being rude to the flight attendant.
Why the hell are you being a jerk to someone who’s only job it is is to make you happy and keep you safe? While you’re being a complete asshole, you’re making everyone around you want to punch you in the snout.
Not paying attention to boarding announcements.
Yes, the aggravation begins before you even get on the plane. The flight attendant called rows 20-25 to board. You are sitting in row 17, so why the hell are you in line, sir?! Go take yourself back to Cinnabon and wait like the rest of us.
People eating Cinnabon.
This is only annoying because what the hell why didn’t I think to get a Cinnabon? Why am I on a diet? I WANT THAT CINNAMON GOODNESS AND YOU’RE A JERK FOR HAVING IT IN FRONT OF ME.

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