Dating is never easy.
Add an athlete to the equation and you really have a lot on your hands! In order to continue to flourish as an individual and maintain a healthy relationship, you must be a confident, independent, and emotionally strong individual. Dating an athlete is not child’s play my friends. Life can come at you very quickly and it is best to always remain on top of your game in order to keep your dignity as well as your relationship. Here are some things you must keep in mind when you find yourself enamored with your athlete.
DO: Master the art of giving massages.
Your athlete boo will be sore 90% of the time. Make sure you are comfortable with rolling up your sleeves and giving a nice massage – without him having to ask. Pick out a calming massage oil and get to work! He deserves it!
DON’T: Nag him about him sleeping habits, especially on off days.
His profession – what allows him to put food on the table, clothes on his backs, and a roof over his heads, etc.- requires him to sacrifice his body every day! Understand that. I’m sure he would love to hang out with you all day but most of the time sleep will be more important. A pleasant compromise would be to snuggle with him and take a little nap — You get to feel his warm embrace as you cuddle and he gets to rest his body and get some shut-eye.
DO: Understand that bae will have fans.
It comes with the territory. People will admire him for some reasons you would never imagine. And some these fans will be very attractive. Be confident and enjoy the fact that you have what many want.
DON’T: Drive yourself crazy trying to be the visibly obvious girlfriend
Learn how to stay low and build. Having your couple pictures all over Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram will not keep him from cheating if that is his end game. You don’t have to announce every single romantic moment for the world to know that he is your man. All you need to do is ensure you are treated with respect and that it is a genuinely happy relationship. The rest should come naturally.
DO: Help him uphold a good reputation.
He has a lot of pressure to perform well on and off the field/court. While you have very little influence on his game time decisions, it is important that you help to make sound choices while the play clock has stopped ticking. I’m not telling you to become his mother, he has one already, but it is valuable to recognize that his off-season lifesyle is just as important as his in-season lifestyle.
DON’T: Do anything stupid that will hurt his or your reputation.
Humans enjoy watching things crash and burn. You, your man, and your relationship are not immune to this natural desire. Play it safe and be sure not to give them any ammunition to fuel the fire of destruction.
DO: Understand he will have various social events to which he is obliged.
There will be many events – social, charitable, etc. – that he will need to go to. Due to these events, your one-on-one time will often be cut short. Plan ahead and set aside designated quality time rather than huffing and puffing every time he says he has to go out.
DON’T: Attend each gathering just because you want to be seen.
That’s a quick and petty way of getting left. If he wants you there, he will invite you. If you think he needs you to chaperone his actions while he is out, then you do not trust him and you shouldn’t be involved with him in the first place. A quick way to put things into perspective is to consider how much you would like it if the roles were reversed. Just saying.
DO: Understand his tax bracket is a lot different than your average Joe.
It is okay to enjoy some of the more luxurious and finer things in life. Don’t get crazy, however it is not a bad thing if he wants you to live within his lavish means.
DON’T: Be a “jersey chaser” and solely rely on his income for stability
You are only as much as you bring to the relationship. If you are there just to be a dependent, you might as well move back home with your parents so that they can claim you on their taxes. If you are with him, it should be for reasons more than the fact that he signed a x-million dollar contract with a certain team. At any given moment, or injury, this dream could be over. You should be in a good place regardless, so that if anything were to happened (God forbid), you would be okay! If he ever wasn’t able hold you down financially, make sure you have your stuff together where you can. Being independent and self sufficient is so much more attractive than you think.
DO: Understand he will be traveling, a lot.
Once again, it comes with the territory. Just accept that you all will be using Skype and Facetime frequently.
DON’T: Throw it his excessive traveling in his face with the “You’re never home” card.
Umm, duh! What did you expect? This is part of his job and if you are not down to ride, then it’s time for you to get to stepping!
DO: Be willing to cook big meals for two
Let’s face it, you are no longer cooking for you and your fun-sized college roommate. You are now cooking for someone who burns off almost every ounce of his previous meal in one workout warmup. Portion control is still an important health value, but be sure to recognize that his metabolism is running much faster than he would like for it to run and he is constantly hungry!
DON’T: Complain about how quickly you all go through eggs
Seriously, just get over the fact that the grocery store runs will be a lot more frequent. A two egg omelette is damn near a snack! Whining about how fast you all go through food is silly and I don’t understand why you think it would be any different.
DO: Be supportive at all times.
This seems very obvious but a lot of people have a hard time showing genuine support. Be sure to be his number one fan at all times – win or lose. And don’t think for a second he buys your fake supportive act. He can see right through that.
DON’T: Push him to talk when he doesn’t want to.
Losing hurts regardless of if its regular season or post season playoffs. Know when to give him his space – you all will find/make time to talk about it later. Don’t push him to express his feelings about his loss immediately after the game. You can still show support by giving him space.
And there you have it folks! I’m not going to drop names and tell you all how I am confident in this knowledge but just know that #StayLowAndBuild has been in effect long before it was made popular by a twitter beef.