Please find your way to the nearest arena and have yourself several seats.
This past weekend, The Library took a little trip to our old stomping grounds in Boston where we made bad decisions, reunited with college friends, and for lack of a better word, turned all the way up. Birthday celebrations in our group are kind of a big deal and known to get a little wild. With that being said, there is a general understanding that on someone’s birthday you do not try to steal the spotlight as if you and your issues come before the birthday celebration. In general, each of us only has one day [weekend if your friends are about that life] a year to be the center of attention and be the sole reason for a turn up function. One day. So when that day comes, out of respect for the birthday individual, it is usually expected for people to leave their drama at home. If it is not your birthday please save your bulls*it for a more appropriate time.
I thought this was common knowledge until Friday night when I realized that not everyone likes to follow the rules. Now, when it comes to being single and the dating life, I will admit that things can get pretty messy at times. As a single person, you are allowed to see as many people as you would like. The problems will only arise when the individuals in your rotation start to think they are “Bae” [before-anyone-else] and believe that you two are in an actual relationship.
Note: Ladies, just because you are a consistent hook-up does not mean you are the girlfriend. There needs to be a certain conversation and agreement that takes place before you can earn the public title of “girlfriend.” Know your role. Always.
Back to the story. My friend embodies the term “bachelor” and has his fair share of ladies within his rotation. I’ve recently learned that one of these ladies has earned her way up the ranks of his rotation and has received special rights – i.e. P.D.A, official invite to his birthday, etc. Kudos to her. Unfortunately, another rotational employee didn’t quite make the list of invitees, and she took it upon herself to show up. Now, if she had known and accepted her place in his life and still decided to grace us with her presence, she would have come and at least tried to make nice with his other friends. Why? Because if she wanted to remain anywhere near his rotation, she would know not to act a monkey-fool. PSA: Men do not like women who are constantly causing a scene. It’s not cute.
This particular shorty really had one of two choices: 1) Stay home and humble on this Friday night and send a nice birthday text to let him know you care; 2) Show up without the invite but play nice. Well as you can probably assume, she decided against both. Now, I’m not going to blame her for being offended by my friend’s decision to NOT invite her — she probably thought they were closer than that. But to create drama at someone else’s birthday celebration that of which you were NOT invited to in the first place — HUGE mistake.
She first messed up when she included fellow platonic female friends into the generalized “hoe” description. Sorry sweetie, we are not all vying for the attention of your beloved. Do not ever in your life get my friendship confused with romantic desire. Ever. Her second mistake: approaching him with an attitude. Boo-boo, nobody told you to come in the first place, so you do not have the right to be upset about the guest-list. Getting all hot-and-bothered with him on his birthday is what you are not going to do.
Anyone who knows me, knows how protective I am of my friends and I simply do not play that game. Therefore, a regulation was required because the Library was not going to allow the third-string quarterback to ruin the game – not on our watch. All we needed to do was make our presence known and she knew to pump her breaks and slow it down. IT. WAS. NOT. HER. BIRTHDAY.
Lessons of this post: 1) Always know your role. 2) Refrain from attending parties to which you are not invited. 3) Should you attend said party – refrain from starting any type of drama – especially with the host. 4) Never mess with friends of the Library.