The Latest

Love & Relationships: How to Handle Being Single as F**k!

You’re still waiting for your bae too, huh?

So far this summer I’ve had the lovely experiences of attending my high school reunion, a wedding and what appeared to be a couple’s night out, by my damn self! There is nothing like having all your confidence shot to hell as you are walking through the doors of the event because it just hit you… you are single as f**k!  That being said, I’d rather be single than in an awful relationship but, the awkward moments you realize your status can be a little unnerving.


I was recently at work and this man came up to me to invite me on a date towards the end of the week. Now, I was far from interested in this man who appeared to be 15 years my senior, but I tried to be as polite as possible since he still a guest at my place of work.  I couldn’t make a scene because then I would be in the wrong.  I politely declined using the “I’m-going-to-be-busy-every-day-of-my-life” excuse, but when he left it finally hit me… I’m so single I couldn’t even lie about having a boyfriend! I had to chuckle a little bit because it was true, as I was fishing for excuses to decline his invitation I never once considered simply using the Girl Code go-to, “Sorry, I have a boyfriend.”  It may be because I’m a terrible liar or just the fact that I had nobody at the forefront of my brain that I thought would be upset about this date.  Thankfully my “busy” excuse was enough and he left, but damn, I’m really one of those single twenty somethings with nothing yet, everything to live for!

True, we all long for someone to cuddle with on rainy days and someone to make us feel better when everything seems to be going wrong, but what happens when being single is actually working for you? Let’s take the phone for example: if I had a boo-thing, I’d make sure my phone stayed fully charged and was always in arms-reach.  Due to my current status, I can’t even tell you the amount of times I have let my phone die, or simply left it inside somewhere while I took a walk or a dip in the pool.  The anxiety behind always staying connected is so far gone and I feel great! Yes, it would be nice if I had a special someone to care about how my day was going but I’m completely fine without all that.

Being a young single woman really is not all that terrifying. It has given me the opportunity to branch out and make new friendships and even strengthen old ones.  One of the perks is being able to enjoy life with your friends without feeling guilty for leaving your partner behind, or waiting by the phone.  I can go out, eat late, and come home when I please and have to answer to nobody [except maybe that guy I exchanged numbers with…but he was cute. Whatever].  Ahhh freedom!


It is so wild to think back to my “wifey” days when I would only build my confidence and self esteem off the compliments my boyfriend would dish out, rather than feeling good about myself without anyone else’s input.  A true testament to learning what it means to love yourself first! I’ve learned how important it is and how happy you become once you finally learn and honor that valuable lesson.

Even with my career path currently pending, I can pack up my stuff and move to another city whenever I please.  If I wanted to go live across the country, I could. If I wanted to go abroad for a few years, I could. Of course these types of relocations require excessive amounts of money, but that is besides the point! The bigger picture is that I am free as a bird to go where I please with no-one else’s feelings to worry about. All I have to worry about is how to pay for it and if it is the right decision for me.

While I look forward to finding a special someone and making memories with a new “him”, the whole single life is kind of nice. Yes, I’ll admit I can get lonely and a little flustered at the initial realization of my deeper level of singledom; however, that moment quickly passes. So, if you are anything like me: bae-less and actually loving it, don’t fret the brief moments of loneliness.  Just think of all the perks of our lifestyle and the next time you are getting down on yourself, stand up straight with your head held high and proudly say to yourself “Hell yeah, I’m single as f**k!”

demi happy

About Spilled Tea (69 Articles)
Life happens.

3 Trackbacks / Pingbacks

  1. The Daily Read: It’s OKAY to Play the Curving Game | The Library
  2. The Daily Read: Let Love Happen [via Mangoes & Coffee] | The Library
  3. The Daily Read: Competitive Dating – Never Let Him Win | The Library

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: